On The Beach Blog | April 2013

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Exit Becky... Hello Liz!

Ms. Molinaro, we hardly knew ya, but Westhampton Beach's loss certainly is East Hampton's gain, and after the ridic­u­lous antics you survived during your all too brief tenure here, 11937 should seem like a sunny week at the beach.

Elizabeth Lindtvit and Rebecca Molinaro

And with your years already here, Mrs. Lindtvit, there shouldn't be any surprises. I'm confident that your eyes were open wide when you made your decision.

Good luck, ladies! All the best!

Monday, April 29, 2013

Everyone knew this was coming...

...but it still doesn't absolve the New York Jets from im­mediately climbing to the very pinnacle of "Professional Sports Teams that Institutionally Stink!"

Here's why:

Tim Tebow waived by New York Jets after one season

I've no idea of how good a pro quarterback Tebow More...

What took'em so long?

Recent New York Newsday headline:

The current Cannonball

LIRR: 'Cannonball' run straight from Penn to Hamptons

(This is what passes for "clever" with their head­line writers of today.)

The question is why wasn't this done decades ago?

I mean the "Cannonball" ac­tu­ally began life as an express train operating between Long Island City and Southampton 120 years ago, so the concept isn't entirely new. More...

Sunday, April 28, 2013


Still, we had'em sweatin' the whole second half! If 'Melo just makes those free throws near the end of the 4th Quarter!

But as John McCabe... no, not Dr. John McCabe!... was fond of reminding folks throughout "McCabe & Mrs. Miller:"

"If a frog had wings, he wouldn't bump his ass so much...."

Just so!

Aw jeez!

Knicks logo

Now I know I hexed the Knicks!

Jeanne and I just got off a plane at Islip/Mac only to learn is that this year's Sixth Man Award-winner, J.R. Smith, the Knicks' num­ber two scorer so far in the play-offs, is watching Game #4 in street clothes, having been sus­pended for a Flagrant Foul (2) in Friday's game. More...

Saturday, April 27, 2013

The Curse of the Parquet Floor

Knicks logo

Ray Overton, do not read this!

If the Knicks... our New York Knicks... decide to become the first team in the history of the National Basketball As­so­ciation to lose a series in which they had been leading three games to none, I don't want you coming to my house with a carload of pressure cookers stuffed with kerosene and fertilizer because you think I put a jinx on their playoff series with the Boston Celtics by posting this before a clincher! More...

Friday, April 26, 2013

Upon further reflection...

...and a night's solid sleep, I re-read Southampton Press correspondent Erin McKinley's coverage of the public portion of Wednesday evening's Special Meeting, and one quote in particular jumped out at me.

"We had worked on this resolution and discussed it two meetings ago and got some input from everybody. I'd like to see this happen considering that in a couple of days we are going to be with someone new, and we have always had someone to come and train the new person—or assist the new person—and work with them. And that is why I feel it is necessary." More...

Biting my tongue only so much!

Westhampton Beach Board Hires Former Clerk To Train New Clerk

"......Village Board members voted in favor of rehiring retired Village Clerk Kathy McGinnis to train new a new and as yet unnamed village clerk/treasurer...."

For the second time in a week, this was done as More...

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Another embarrassment for ESPN

Can't say what number last evening's "SportsNation" was in a series of mis-fires for "The Worldwide Leader In Sports," but it was downright painful to watch as the final two minutes of the telecast reveals.

(I just stumbled on it while seeking the Red Wings-Kings telecast, so all I saw was the very end.)

Revealing the results of an on-line viewers poll for who should be on the package cover for the 25th anniversary edition of Madden NFL for Xbox 360 and PS3 video game consoles, it demonstrated conclusively that ESPN should stick to what it does best: reporting sports scores, tele­vising actual sporting contests, and creating fake More...

Like to see this happen...

...in truth, I'd like to see anything happen in this particular location!

New Mediterranean Restaurant Could Open In Westhampton Beach

It would be a great boon to the downtown area on several counts. More...

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Warning Warning Warning...

...carpetbagger alert! If you found a glossy magazine in your mailbox lately and didn't immediately toss the sucker because of the large "Westhampton Life" across the cover, beware!

It has about as much to do with "Westhampton" or "life" in our area as "Harper's Bazaar" does with open air markets in Harpers Ferry, West Virginia... or, for that matter, bucks locking antlers on Aspatuck Road. More...

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

If not the 'Smoking Gun,' then...

...certain inferences can reasonably be made from the wording of the March 16, 2013 letter to the Village from the accounting firm of Satty, Levine & Ciacco over the signature of Managing Partner Frank W. Sluter.

Addressed to the Mayor and copied to Scott Augustine and the Board of Trustees, it reads: More...

Monday, April 22, 2013

Who knew...

...that Daenerys Targaryen was that multilingual that she understood every slur, every vile insult uttered by Kraznys mo Nakloz, the slaver in the city of Astapor, while negotiat­ing the purchase of the Unsullied to form her army?

I had all the information, but I'd forgotten a critical part of the stirring declaration the young woman had made over the funeral bier of her husband at the very end of season one of HBO's "Game of Thrones." More...

Easily the most assinine headline...

...of the Millennium, so far, has to be the one on last evening's on-line edition of The Hill:

Report: Boston attack suspects not licensed to own firearms

Really? Besides Dianne Feinstein, who the hell cares?

Were the "Boston attack suspects" licensed to own pressure cookers?

Correspondent Mike Lillis also writes:

"The news that the suspects were not authorized to own firearms will likely add fuel to calls for tougher gun laws...."

Undoubtedly, but it immediately exposes the callers' true agenda, and reveals that any act of violence of any sort is fair game for the hoplophobic gun-banners.

Friday, April 19, 2013

April 19th...

...a date I take note of on an annual basis as it is an an­ni­versary of some notable events, all, with one exception, within my lifetime.

  • 1775: The "shot heard 'round the world" is fired at Lexington Common, and so begins the American Revolution. More...

Thursday, April 18, 2013

All hail the terrible 'gun lobby!'

My late friend Neal Knox always began his appearances at public gatherings with the salutation, "Hello, gun lobby!"

He was speaking to the garden variety firearms owner and supporter of the Constitution, the very same American citizen that President Obama railed against as a "willful liar," made Vice-President Biden weepy, sent Senator Diane Feinstein into a paroxysm of finger-wagging, launched NYC Mayor Bloomberg into a tirade, and editorial pages across the country into a reflex of extreme objurgation. More...

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

April Village Board Work Session

What a mish-mosh of a meeting at Six Corners this evening... the only item calendared was the monthly Work Session of the Westhampton Beach Village Board, but there was supposed to be...

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Got'er good this year!

Jeanne, whose birthday was yesterday, hates surprises... loves to surprise others, of course, but the higher power forbid that she be on the receiving end of a "gotcha" herself, and has developed an uncanny ability to suss out, and thwart, my attempts to fête her surreptitiously.

Or maybe I'm just inept in such matters... 'til yesterday.

It was pretty much spontaneous on my part for the More...

Monday, April 15, 2013

Who are these idiots?

From yesterday's USA TODAY, authored by that airhead, Jackie, daughter of Dennis, Kucinich:

"The Manchin-Toomey amendment to the Senate gun bill would require background checks on all firearms for sale at gun shows or on the Internet."

Really? "On the Internet." More...

Saturday, April 13, 2013

It's not like we didn't know...

...how cable Starz "Spartacus" was going to end. For all the liberties the writers took with the ancient narratives of Plutarch and Florus about the Thracian mercenary-turned-gladiator-turned-freedon fighter, Spartacus delenda est!

But I didn't watch it for it's historical accuracy! I followed it because it was a throwback to the R-rated grindhouse flicks of the '70s celebrated by Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rod­ríguez in their 2007 film of that name. More...

Friday, April 12, 2013

The world will laugh less...

Jonathan Winters

...with the passing Thurs­day of Jonathan Winters, at his home in Montecito, California.

Not familiar with Winters?

If you're familiar with the characters and voices of Robin Williams, Winters was the original... but without the recreational drugs... which the younger man has never been reluctant to acknowledge. More...

Stalked by paparazzi ?

...here's how Castor fiber handles it:

Damn straight! Get out of my face with your freakin' camera! Sic semper evello mortem paparazzi!

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Bob Schunk (1938-2013)

...and I am way late on this one, having just seen his obit in this morning's Southampton Press Western Edition.

His passing physically startled me... I jolted upright in my chair when I saw his smiling photo at the top of page A12, as he had sent me a brief E-mail just me several weeks ago calling attention to what an idiot Andrew Cuomo is. More...

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Ooooooooooh, nooooooooo!

...or, possibly, a Bess Mess Part Two!

Lindsay Lohan Rehab Facility Surrounded by Temptation

I saw the original item on TMZ courtesy of Google Alerts several hours ago but passed it up because it was TMZ, #1, and, #2, some of their report didn't jibe with Seafield Cen­ter's charter and procedures, to wit: More...

Tuesday, April 09, 2013

So fair a day I have not yet seen...

...this early in the Spring: 80°F, as I write this. Or if I have, I certainly don't recall it.

Good reason! If Long Island Weather is to be trusted, the record high for this date was 73°F in 1981.

'S all right with me! Jeanne, the dogs and I were actually out, if not quite sunning outselves, then taking the air.

If an aeroplane doesn't crash in a Bethpage subdivision, the weather will doubtless be the lead story on News12 LI this evening, and front page Newsday tomorrow.

Remember, you read it here first.

Annette Funicello (1942-2013)

Annette Joanne Funicello

"I never will forget... Annette Funicello.
Just to think of her, it gives my heart a pang...."

(With apologies to Gus Kahn and Judy Garland.)

Actually, Funicello, who passed away yesterday fol­lowing a 26-year battle with multiple sclerosis, wasn't even my favorite Mouseketeer... that honor fell to More...

Monday, April 08, 2013

Eruv case clarifies - II

The legal jousting between the Villages of Westhampton Beach and Quogue, the Town of Southampton, East End Eruv Association, Verizon and Long Island Power Authority recently had its path through the preliminary Courts system cleared a bit by a Joint Stipulation of Uncontested Facts Regarding Verizon's and LIPA's Authority to License At­tachments to their Utility Poles.

Of particular interest in the document are items... More...

Saturday, April 06, 2013

Eruv case clarifies for Village...

...but was thrust into the lap of the Southampton Town Zoning Board of Appeals Thursday evening as the E³A's application was formally presented to that quasi-judicial body.

Group Seeks Southampton Town Zoning Board Approval For Religious Boundary In Westhampton Beach

Unfortunately, the headline is inaccurate, and should More...

Thursday, April 04, 2013

April Village Board Meeting

Updated 04/05/2013 – 03:57 pm

It was probably the most contentious monthly Village Board meeting in Westhampton Beach since the infamous illegal resolutions session of March 2010, and at the end of it, the voting bloc run by ex-Trustee Joan Levan... Hank Tucker, Patricia DiBenedetto and Junior Palmer... may or may not have passed a walk-on resolution appointing former Village Clerk Kathleen McGinnis to a newly created $60/hour position similar to that of a Village Administrator.

That resolution, carried on by Deputy Mayor Tucker, was one I never saw coming, and based on the outburts of out­rage from former Deputy Mayor Toni-Jo Birk and a number of Village staff, neither did anyone else. More...

Tuesday, April 02, 2013

Stick it, Scott Boras!

In my personal pantheon of off-the-field sports personages, the bottom three names, in descending order, are Michelle Beadle (as they used to say in olden days, "no better than she ought to be," Jim Rome (a punk) and "super agent" Scott Boras.

So it warmed the recesses of my black heart this morning when I heard on WFAN that Boras had been dismissed by New York Yankees perenniel All Star second baseman and Most Valuable Player candidate Robinson Canó. More...

Monday, April 01, 2013

'Game' on!

Season three of "Game of Thrones" did kick-off last evening, and while some aficionados may have felt it sub-standard for its lack of action, it got us back into the narra­tive flow after a 42 week hiatus.

No major deaths but we met some major new personages and saw the return of the honorable aging peerless warrior Ser Barristan Selmy after being unceremoniously put out to pasture by faux King Joffrey and his über-bitch of an incest-inclined mother, Cersei, at the end of season one.

And yes, there were dragons... by the new Gods and old, they've gotten big in a relatively short span of time... and equally welcomed was a large white dire wolf just in time to save Samwell Tarly from something ghastly.

I love dire wolves... especially white ones... and rank them right up there with Daenerys' dragons!

O, yeah! The "Game" is definitely on!