On The Beach Blog | December 2013

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

The two least surprised guys...

...in the immediate universe are me 'n' my old movie-going buddy Collins Crowther!

Jennifer Lawrence Named Most Bankable Star of 2013

Our immediate reaction wasn't "Really?" so much as "'Bout damned time!" More...

Monday, December 30, 2013

Really, Matthew?

Today was "Black Monday" throughout the National Football League as the regular season ended last night and as the day wore on, so did some coaching jobs.

The one which most interested me was Jim Schwartz, who's been at the helm of my Detroit Lions for the past five years since he took over the only 0-16 franchise in NFL history. More...

If you can't say something nice...

...at the very least don't say something stupid!

Rapper Doe B killed in Alabama

Numerous messages of condolence and remembrance came by E-mail, FaceBook and Twitter... yes, we do live in a digital world!... including a tweet from "T.I." (née Clifford Joseph Harris, Jr.) the co-founder of Doe B's label, Grand Hustle Records. More...

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Silda splits from Spitz...

Silda Wall Spitzer and what's-his-name

...and heading into the new year, the former Ms. Wall looks to be the catch of 2014!

And good better luck to her the next time around!

I've never understood why this beautiful, brainy and well-bred woman "stood by the man" when he was exposed as "Client #9" of the prostitute procure­ment organization known as the "Emperors Club."

Spitzer has proved to be little more than a rutting dog and after taking More...

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Christmas Eve visitation

The House of Speir has holiday visitors from the strange and distant land of inner city Philadelphia...

Ike and Kate

...and taking a breather from tending their Emerald Street Park project.

Accompanying "Santa" Ike is his mistress, Kate, second born of Jeanne.

And as my own daughter Peggy long ago once said, "We're having some Christmas."

Sunday, December 22, 2013


Detroit Lions

That's what my cousin Charlie calls them: "Pussycats... the Detroit Pussycats!"

And after the past two years, I cannot disagree with his assessment... par­ticularly this season which effectively ended for them in overtime today! More...

Saturday, December 21, 2013


...pocketa-pocketa-pocketa... crap!

Honestly, did we really need another movie version of humor­ist James Thurber's classic short story, "The Secret Life of Walter Mitty," first published in The New Yorker magazine in 1939?

When Hollywood threw a pail of mid-'40s money at Thurber, the result was a modestly successful starring vehicle More...

Friday, December 20, 2013

For the LGBT 'community...'

...it's a huge step backward from achieving their purport­ed goals of tolerance and acceptance in today's society.

'Duck Dynasty' star suspended for anti-gay remarks

(For the uninitiated... like me... "Duck Dynasty" is a wildly successful reality show cablecast by, of all things, A&E.) More...

Thursday, December 19, 2013

O for the love of Daffy Duck!


  • I am not a hunter, and while I was half-a-century ago engaged to reduce the Sylvilagus floridanus populace running amok on several estates in Rem­senburg, I've never been water-fowling in my life.
  • I have no idea of who Pola Rapaport of Hampton Bays is other than a letter-writer in this morning's Southampton Press Western Edition.

And it is that letter I must address. More...

Monday, December 16, 2013

Death Notices

There were a number of notable passings announced this weekend, Oscar-winning actress Joan Fontaine, non-Oscar-winning actor despite a record eight nominations Peter O'Toole, and hyphenate Tom Laughlin, a very limited actor but a visionary film-maker who changed the way movies have been marketed and distributed for the past 40+ years.

But perhaps the biggest surprise death of the weekend was that of "Nicholas Brody" of cable Showtime's "Homeland" who was strung up in a public square in Tehran and hang­ed by suspended strangulation rather than the traditional drop in the series' third season finale. More...

Sunday, December 15, 2013

Timely CBS Report

The telephone call came in at 4:21 this afternoon from a private number in an undisclosed location.

The voice at the other end of the line was unmistakably Far Eastern in origination, was very polite... and very insistent, even to the point of threatening me if I failed to comply with his directions.

(Yup! Polite and ominous... he pulled it off.) More...

Saturday, December 14, 2013

The Heisman Disappointment

The annual awarding of the prestigeous Heisman Trophy to the nation's outstanding college football player wasn't the biggest disappoint of the day for me... that was another Army loss to Navy on the 50th anniversary of one of those service academies' most notable games, one delayed two weeks due to the sudden death of a President.

Cablecast live from New York City's Marriott Marquis... the Downtown Athletic Club venue is a thing of the past... the presentation has become less an awards ceremony than a celebrity event crafted for television. More...

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Inside the former American Embassy...

...in Tehran is one of the oddest murals imaginable de­pict­ing what "Iranian hard-liners" feel best represents the United States... or, as we are still known to them: "the Great Satan!"

Mural inside the abandoned U.S. Embassy in Tehran

Anyone recognize the source material? More...

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

I have history there!

On this morning's 27East:

Southampton Town Buys Neptune's; Lifts Curtain On Renovation Plans

If there is one single element in Michael Wright's report to give one pause about the Town's purchase of the pre-WW II Coast Guard life-saving station with $3.2 million of Com­munity Preservation Funds, it's this: More...

Everyone knows her name...

...and even more now that last Summer's bio-pic is available on DVD. This answer was a little too easy!

Linda Lovelace, circa 1972

More people, especially those on the back nine of life, will be more familiar with this image of the young woman who was a house­hold name throughout the '70s and beyond. More...

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Whooooooooo is she?

Who is this woman?

The only hint I'll provide is that this internationally known person is a former resident of Center Moriches.

Monday, December 09, 2013

I'm really really ticked off!

"Rage is the only quality which has kept me, or anybody I have ever studied, writing columns for newspapers."

Today's irritation stems from this headline:

Torre, La Russa, Cox to Cooperstown

"Joe Torre, Tony La Russa and Bobby Cox, baseball's winningest managers over the past four decades, were unanimously elected to the Hall of Fame on Monday by the expansion era committee." More...

Sunday, December 08, 2013

I hear...

...Córdoba, a central province of Argentina, is nice this time of year.

Looting spreads in Argentina's third largest city as police go on strike

Seems Argentina has nothing like a Taylor Law. More...

Wednesday, December 04, 2013

A showpiece for Main Street

It's a shame that Simon Jorna is so stubborn... if he had not dug his heels in 10-11 years back, and spent count­less thousands of dollars on attorneys and architects in a vain attempt to end run the municipal processes ad­ministered by the Westhampton Beach Building Depart­ment, his showpiece Beach Bakery Café would've been up and running midway through the last decade, and the Main Street area would have been that much the better for it that much sooner.

By any criteria, it's a beauty! More...

Tuesday, December 03, 2013

Someone... no names, please...

...seems to have gotten a little too caught up in cable AMC's "The Walking Dead" craze!

While "work safe," hereinafter prepare to be disturbed if not revolted! More...

Monday, December 02, 2013

Why I hate the media: XLVIII

It's crap like this:

Actor-comedian dies, 6 hurt in Wisconsin deer-hunting opener

Now, what is the reader to not unnaturally suppose before clicking on the link to the story? Opening day of deer sea­son, Right? Woods full of blood sport hunters? More...

Sunday, December 01, 2013

Yada Yada Yada...

...or, as we used to say in the days before "Seinfeld," blah blah blah!

Kinda makes one wonder how the Hindenburg disaster, the sneak attack on Pearl Harbor or JFK assassination would have been handled by local news channels today... More...